Money back guarantee

You want to lose pounds of excess weight?



Here's the absolute guaranteed sure-fire way:

Eat less, move more.

(Dine less, exercise more.)

There you have it - what more could you ask for?

You need a "personal weight-loss trainer" to tell you that?



You want to lose pounds of excess stupidity?

Here's the absolute guaranteed sure-fire way:

Sleep less, observe more.

(Gossip less, think more.)

There you have it - what more could you ask for?

You need a "personal enlightenment trainer" to tell you that?



You want to know why these two money-back guarantees fail to impress 99% of the population, besides the OBVIOUS fact they are too damn simple (and in the minds of the ordinary 99% - simple means simplistic)? Because the unimpressable 99% of the population - too fat and too stupid for their own good (according to themselves) - think there MUST be a secret out there, a pill, a trick, a device, a method, a guru, and that if they can only FIND it (using their too fat and too stupid intelligence, of course), then they will have "cracked the case."



"Cracking the case" - finding the secret of success - is MORE important to the ordinary 99% than actually losing the fat and losing the stupidity, in fact it's a satisfyingly satisfactory substitute for >>doing the work<<.

Suffering

What a word!

Humans just love it, and they most especially love to express their suffering - from love poems to a lost lover who'll never read it, to hate letters to a magazine editor who'll never read it, and everyone in between.



Oh, humans just luuuuuuv their suffering - especially that particularly sweet smelling mental kind, that they don't even have to TRY to conjure up, it's just there, like stink on shit, or white on rice... no, I think stink on shit is more appropriate.



You know WHY humans luuuuuuv their suffering? Oh, you "think" you do, you "believe" you do, you'll even SAY you do, but do you really? (I'm not talking about someone else, here, I'm talking about you, dear, you the reader right now: "Why do you luuuuuuv your mental suffering?")



I'll tell you - right now, because you need to know this ;^) It's so you can tell someone about it, and then tell them how it all turned out. That's it, in a nutshell, and all wrapped up like a present someone leaves at your door without knocking, and you open up the door, and open that little package, and it !!!EXPLODES!!! in your face, killing many, and leaving you a crippled and damaged, >>thing<< - for awhile, and you start suffering over it, and thinking about it, and telling all your friends and family, ad nauseum (till even THEY get tired of you and your whining), just so you can tell them - much, much later if you're quite ordinary - how it all turned out, you know, that "funny story".



It's delicious the way people luuuuuuv their suffering.

Real Idiocy

Only in the human kingdom, can such a concept be discussed - certainly not in the non-human kingdom, for all non-humans are simply >>what they are<<, doing >>what they do<<, driven by a higher force, Life itself, doing what Life does here.



Only in the human kingdom, can real idiots flourish, and when one bad apple gets into your bushel, *look out*, because in no time at all, the whole bushel becomes compromised.



These bad apples are quite unique in the living kingdom, in that they start dying from the inside out, and only become noticeable, when the degree of death has reached a point that it can be >>communicated<<, and that's how one bad apple can spoil your bushel, unless you are alert, and look out for them.



Bad apples come in many colors and flavors, and humans love them, because they spice up what is generally bland and uninteresting. When a bad apple shows up in the bushel, all the other apples are completely unaware, and as soon as an unaware apple becomes, actually, *aware* of the existence of the bad apple, it has already acquired the dis-ease of the bad apple. The longer this *awareness* of the bad apple persists, the greater degree of dying from the inside out proceeds in the otherwise - except for that *awareness* -healthy, colorful, and succulent apples.



You know what real idiocy is, in the world of humans? You know, right? You don't need to be told, right? And you certainly don't need to ASK? Right?

The Herd Handbook

There is a page in the Herd Handbook, which, unfortunately for most, never made it to the widely published version, yet DID make it into a few of the handbooks:



The (concept of the) herd is NOT out there, in the world of humans - that is, not the conception nor the expression of the concept - though many (read: MOST) take it that way, judging by their gutteral reaction to it when upon hearing about it, think they've been called, sheep.



The herd is somewhere else ENTIRELY! And only a small, small minority ever see that, or at least, see a piece of "that" (herd), for even when they are told, in print, they can't remember it in realtime. And...



Sheep are somewhere else ENTIRELY! But only a smaller still minority ever even catch a glimpse of "them" (sheep), let alone a full-frontal witnessing, for even when they are told, in print (ha! a pun!) they can't remember it or realize it in realtime.



But, when you find out - on your own, not because someone told you about it, and you went, "Yeah, I guess I sorta see what you're suggesting here... but I'm not convinced it's the TRUTH! (I'll have to think about that later.)" - it's a "kind of" awakening, the likes of which you have not experienced yet.



Believe it or don't.

"Resting on one's laurels"

[To rely on one's past achievements instead of working to maintain or advance one's status or reputation.]



This goes hand-in-hand with erecting monuments to one's self-professed achievements as proof of those achievements.



There are several people here and elsewhere (though they likely - and this is funny AND revealing - don't even know who they are), who have made, and are making a career out of "resting on their laurels", and each supposed effort they make to further their shaky status, is nothing but further erections in their life's-work of building a monument to their self-proclaimed prior achievements. (So they write a book, publish a website, author a "My Story" page detailing their "sudden enlightenment.")



"I am GOD realized (and you're not!) Here's what happened."

"I had an instant enlightenment in 1986 (and you didn't!) Here's my story."

"I am a yam and that's all that I yam (and you ain't!) Here's the glorious details."



Nothing but BRICKS in the monument, pushed into place by people who have nothing more intelligent to do with the rest of their lives than erecting monuments while resting on their laurels.



And, they actually think/believe/hope someone is impressed by all that.

Greetings from the future

Groups; up and down, small and large, forever;

stuff bunches up then breaks apart only to bunch up again.



People join groups and they all feel better by their new associations, and so it spirals out and out and captures everything in its path. But it goes beyond just the camaraderie, the communing with other people, the desire for sex - ah, the humanity. It's genetic/magnetic, and first it's happening in your own brain,...



in words; in and out, short and long, forever; non-vocal and sub-vocal "sound" bunches up and forms thought then breaks apart only to bunch up again. Words connect with other words and running through these thoughts is the "prime-ordinal thought" that this-is-thinking, and with all these new associations it readily speaks out and tells off every thought in its path. But it goes beyond just the chaotic symmetry, the harmonic resonance, the symbolic significance. It's electro/chemical, and it's happening out in the civilized world of men,...



in speech; it is the purpose of speech, prepared ones and unprepared ones, forever to put down other words. It is the purpose of speech to invalidate prior speech. It is a self-cleansing mechanism - that which is or has become useless >>should<< be excised, else it brings down the rest, the healthier and more alive parts.

In the beginning...

In the beginning, your "beginning", after your physical beginning, was the word, speech, and practically all child-speak is hostile; parents act as the instigators and invalidators in this dynamic, especially right after all the goo-goo baby-talk ceases... ("Johnny! Stop throwing food on the floor!"). Later, the grown-to-full-size-child (some call them adults, ha!) continues this outward invalidation of everything he/she hears.



Everyone's head, today, is a metaphorical cosmos of "core ideas", little sub-versions of the "core ideas", and clouds of debris fields swirling about the cranium. If you (can) look just a little askance, you can see it.



The sun, or one's sense of oneself (what one thinks/feels one truly is), is the "core idea". Spinning wildly but orderly, arms flailing, about that core, are words which have grouped together quite mechanically and quite semantically and congealed on several, quite distinct when seen, hidden when not, "points of view" - which are little sub-reflections, subversions, clones of the sun-point. And when one or another temporarily transits "into your view", you think it and believe it's you thinking.



The bodies, or planetoids, or concepts you can still remember (in this mental solar system) - mechanically deposited sensations in memory - are constantly smashing into each other, apparently non-destructively as in argument and debate and everyone talking at once, but also, at times, quite destructively as in real "learning" and "realization", and especially "new-realization" - leaving particle trails of broken phrases and tangled twisted logic-strings that get all knotted and clotted. These amorphous yet coherent threads are the ever-tightening asteroid belts that literally separate and sometimes strangulate the larger bodies, or concepts.

The poet and the philosopher

If you put a poet and a philosopher in a ring together, who would win: 1) in a fight to the death, over "what is truth?" 2) in a fight to the death, over "what is beauty?"



Yes, those terms, truth and beauty, are arbitrary, and other similar words could be used, but does a poet, or a philosopher have a built-in advantage over the other?



Specifically, does thought have an advantage over feeling, or feeling over thought? And if so, in which realms, or is it, all realms - where men call home?



Questions, like these, and countless others - meaningless in themselves - are metaphors only, fictions with a temporary life, like atomic rods in a nuclear reactor: at the heart of consciousness is a question, and at the heart of the question, is a paradox. If there is anything resembling a native passion to the mind, then it's curiosity, and if curiosity was an atomic reactor, then The question at the core is the fuel rods.

Ordinariness

Humans have only two possibilities in life, he said dogmatically: 1) to participate in the process, 2) to become the results of the process. (And it's pointless to argue, there is no process, are no results - just look around, at your CRT, etc., results of process.)



This imaginary division can be seen in only one way, by his speech. Humans become the results of their words, expressed either to themselves alone, or to others. Never silent, humans are the result of the process.



Someone "experiences" something they note as being "something" substantial enough to comment upon, and express their comment: they have become the results of the process. Never silent, he is the result of the process.



This is the source of the notion, often expressed as, a man is known by the company (of words) he keeps (speaks); and, as one thinks (of words), so does one become (speaks).



Humans, only (not non-humans which can't speak to us), exist in a never-neverland, a fiction, between Process and Results-of-process, like a fence-rider, eternal, unchanging, willing.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~



In my youth, to reach the city, I walked along the pasture separating our farm from the city road, which was bounded by the most wonderful fence stretching miles, and it was just wide enough to support me the full distance from our farm to the small city we called, Our Town.



While riding that fence, twice a day, I realized that falling was always a possibility, but the outcome always uncertain. That is, I always, "could" fall, but equally - since I hadn't yet - "into what", "landing where", "then what", remained as before, wholly uncertain. That is, I was literally straddling the edge of Infinite Eternity in all dimensions. As far as that little fence-rider, me, was concerned, I was at the center of reality, and non-reality.



This, for me, enlightened the muse of spirituality as distinct from the muse of externality/materiality - themselves straddling the fence by signifying one side or the other of my, narrow fence of possibilities. That is, from the pursuit of worldly fame, money, in the city I was forever travelling to, began the pursuit of spirituality.



It was simply staying on the fence, until I jumped down.

While walking, walk. When done, stop.

Cave-paintings

Everything that mankind thinks and believes about what's going on - inside him and outside him - are cave paintings on the wall. All his theories, stories, fictions, analyses, regarding things immaterial, things he can't touch, fondle, take apart and put back together, from theosophy to philosophy, from psychology to anthropology, are nothing but cave paintings on the wall.



The more paint he applies to that wall, the smaller becomes his little cave, but at least he has some pretty pictures up there to while away the long hours between meals and sex.



He does not realize that there are people outside his particular cave, nor does he even realize what is the cave, nor where is the cave, but it sure has some soothing, comforting pictures up there on the walls.



If someone should happen by the opening to his cave, and shout out some words of encouragement to the cave-dwellers within, they are instantly cursed and told to go away, and the door which was open only a crack anyway, is pushed closed.

An experiment you can do at home

How do you make the cockroaches and kitchen mice come out into the open...



Well, it's simple as pie, and you don't really have to DO anything. Just wait for the sun to go down, turn off all the lights in the house, and if you want to see them and prove to yourself the experiment works as advertised, put on your night-vision goggles (since, as you know, you can't see in the dark), and voila! in just a little while, depending upon what kind of house you keep, cockroaches and kitchen mice galore, having their nightly party in your abode.



Let's just suppose, for the sake of argument, that the several "terms" used in the description of the experiment were symbols for something else. (cockroach, mice, abode, light, goggles)



Let's just suppose, for the sake of argument, that your consciousness could operate in a darkened environment, and think two things at once, without identifying.



What do you suppose the symbols represent, and the bigger/better question, how do you make the cockroaches and kitchen mice go away?



Too obvious, eh?

How belief holds on for dear life

It's not, believing you have a personal life, and then believing that your personal life is an example of anything at all, that's so confusion-producing in the one engaged in that mechanical process of self-delusion, it's that your thinking can't determine how to intercede, and where necessary put a stop to it.



Could you do that, think about what's going on in there - mechanically - you could intercede, in realtime, and become "more" enlightened than you already are, at least in that one endarkened area of belief.



To wit: and this is funny. People get away with saying any damn thing they want, because they realize (incorrectly) that they don't have to back any of it up. They can't (and so don't) cite proof.



So, they say there IS a god, and no one can say to them otherwise, because they can't cite proof and >>believe<< they don't need to, they "believe it", it's part of "their life experience", so... it must be true.



They say there IS a problem with such-and-such a person, for something they did or said, but their memory is so faulty (and apparently their time so valuable) that they don't/can't cite proof, and so continue believing any damn thing they want.



If your own consciousness would NOT ALLOW you to say things, for which you could not cite proof, then you would say a lot less than you do, and you would not continue believing most, if not all, the unprovable claims you make.



Consider that over dinner, if you've got nothing better to do.

Mixing metaphors for fun and profit

Ask anybody, even yourself right now: When you are not *thinking* (there are no perceptible words coming out of your mouth, or onto your keyboard, or banging around inside your head so that you can *hear* them - which means you are NOT watching tv, listening to the radio, reading a book or email, just sitting there, not *thinking* about anything) what's going ON in there?



Do you immediately reply something like, feeling, or sensing, or whatever is left of you, in there, when you are not thinking?



Fact is, there IS no time when you are not thinking, except thinking is the wrong word here, it's a huge mixed-up metaphor.



That is, the metaphor, "thinking" is used by 99% of the planet to describe as best they can their inner mental chattering, daydreaming, etc. But they've totally mixed up their metaphors.



That is, there is a word that much more precisely describes what is going on in there, and if people would only start USING >>that<< word, instead of the >>wrong<< word (thinking), they'd discover a new reality.



But, sitting around thinking about what that *other* word is, or waiting for someone to actually tell you the word, is precisely like opening your mouth and waiting for a roast pidgeon to fly in it.



Good searching, er, uh, thinking... yeah that's the ticket.

The fallacy of 'friendship'

People don't want 'friends' - in fact, that's the last thing they want.



What they really want, is "yes- men" (and "yes-women"), people who will tell them exactly what they (their personality, their "ego") want to hear, that is, not to ruffle feathers but to smooth them.



As soon as you tell, what you consider to be, your friend, that they "suffer from" (are subject to) one or another self-limiting feature -like, they drink WAY too much for their own good, or they smoke too much, or they chatter too much - you run the real risk of losing that person as your friend.



No, people only want "enablers" of their addictions - and those addictions are many, and involve all parts of their nervous system, from instinctive addictions, moving addictions, emotional addictions, and intellectual addictions. Non-friends, strangers, will rarely tell another person of their perceived addictions, not knowing how they will react, and not really caring about them either way anyway. Only supposed, so-called, "friends" will do that, but people do NOT want friends, they want enablers.



All the foregoing is not the TRUTH, it is not even a theory, it is merely a viewpoint. Do you actually HAVE any Real Friends, who won't be your constant enabler, who won't be satisfied with the continual displays of your addictive personality?



Do you even want friends like that?



Or, like most people alive today, do you only want stranger/acquaintances? People who never get to know you well enough to tell you off, tell you the truth as they see it about the way you are?



Welcome to the Über-Mommy, www.internet.com/yahoogroups

You KNOW who your best friend is? Right?

A Definition of Sleep

People are asleep, not ordinarily awake, not conscious of themselves or their actions, and CERTAINLY not of what's being pumped through their automatically-running-on- overdrive brain, that they continually identify with, become identified with - they actually BELIEVE they are the author of the words that they write, the thoughts that they "think".



You are asleep, as in a waking dream. And waking up, or trying to wake up, is becoming aware of what's being pumped through that organ, at all times - not once an hour, not once a day (if you're lucky), but at all times, AND calling a non-conscious act, an instance of being asleep... YET AGAIN, like so, so many times before (can you say, >>all the time<


But, hey, people don't LIKE to be told these things, because they BELIEVE they're above such facts, especially when told to them by someone they don't like, or don't know, and/or BELIEVE must be a fool on wheels for having stated it so directly.



Knowing what's going on is being awake. Believing you're awake is being sound asleep.

Baby talk

Some people say they believe that "eventually we find out that we were born fully perfected and that was our clue, to try and return to that condition when we were first born."



This is incorrect from the get-go.

Sorry if that pops any balloons.



Many people think it, and it has been bandied about for centuries, but "going back to the source" is devolution, not evolution. Returning to the more simplistic childhood of mankind is not the direction a sane, thinking man would choose, if he understood that the true direction is toward a more complex existence, and especially a more complex intelligence.



Man is more complex in all things today than 500 years ago, and that is right order. Mankind is not naturally reverting to the jungle, and nobody in their right mind would choose that.



People were born fully perfected sheep in a herd of similar sheep - capable of staggeringly complex machines and medicine and other things - but to stay a sheep when more is possible is stagnation - which is all ordinary humanity can expect, and therefore most find some kind of bogus religion or teaching to support this idiotic viewpoint. It's tantamount to, rationalized justification (in their own minds) of ***giving-up*** - or, dying before your time.

Teachers and their flocks

Or, if you like, Students and their mentors.



But, that duality does not exist, though everybody thinks just exactly otherwise, and "I can prove it!" they say, "Just lookee over here... and over there... SEE?".



But, they can't prove it, because if they understood something, they'd already know, there ARE no students, only teachers. (Now, obviously, we're not talking about teaching someone with a blue thumb how to grow vegetables, or build bridges out of trees, or catch wildboar on the hoof with only a knife - that's a different "animal" (punny, huh?). No, we're talking ONLY about that internal, mental world of talk, men are so well known for all around the planet - well, by those who can talk of course - such wholly intangible subjects as morality, love, justice, enlightenment, liberation, waking up, etc.)



In those intellectual pursuits - reading and talking about that reading, which 99.99999% of the time is the order these things occur - EVERYONE is the Teacher, and there are no students, period!!



(You know what I'm referring to here, right? So I don't need to elaborate on this, right?)



Ok, ok, someone needs more "proof!"



Everybody - bar none, including you (if you needed that itsy-bitsy qualifier) - is a Teacher, period, and there are no "students," period, because in all things mental, thought-based, intellectual, regarding non-material matters, and non-survival matters, everybody is ONLY talking about their own consciousness' point-of-view regarding whatever they're talking about. That is, there is no one on the planet who has more direct access, in realtime, to the "conscious part of the brain" (in your own head) that thinks those thoughts running around in there, some of which reach your lips and fingers. No one.



Therefore, you are Teaching everybody you come into contact with, either verbally in person, or via an email message, something about your own inner world, viz. the "conscious part of the brain" that uttered/wrote those sentences. Top to bottom, YOU are the teacher of yourself, and there is no "student" out there, per se, just other teachers of themselves.



Now, there is only one leeeeeetle problem with all this, and you know what that is, right? In general, nobody realizes this situation, in realtime, and as such, there's nobody home when the Teacher is "in session", thus all that brilliant material just literally goes up in smoke, helping no one.



Well, there it is. My bit of teaching about "my" conscious part of the brain as it was compelled to teach it this time. Hopefully, for me, the next one will as interesting for me, as this one was. As for you, well, don't you think it's time for YOU to start teaching yourself?!?



ps- instead of constantly, and continuously referring to everybody else on the planet as, "people I admire and learn from" yada-yada-yada, or (as more usual) "people I don't admire and disdain" yada-yada-yada.

Where's Waldo?

Hey, Waldo, answer up dude.



What's the most precious thing in the world to you - not counting other humans, because that's kind of an unfair question, self-sacrifice "being what it is" - more precious than your car, your job, your bank, even more precious than your left foot, more than your right arm, more than both legs, even more than both arms?



Well, Waldo, are you still considering, or did you know the right - and only - answer instantly?



What if you were confronted with the decision, whereby you'd either become a quadraplegic for the next 20 years, minimum, but could keep that "most precious thing", OR, lose that "most precious thing" forever, while keeping all your limbs for the next 20 years, minimum.



Well, Waldo, which onea doze?

Are are you still trying to figure out what is your "most precious thing"?



By the way, the right - and only sane - answer consists of one word, already known to you, and one which you use frequently (no, silly, not necessarily "the word" - which you do use, of course - but what it signifies.)



Hey, Waldo, answer up dude.



ps- oh yeah, for all those (most) who pass this question by without even a moment's further consideration, or who do not pass it by, but reject it out of hand, or who do not reject it but are confused by, or argue with the premise ("Me, I ain't GOT no damn 'most precious thing'"), consider this: if you didn't get the right - and only -answer, instantly after hearing the question "What's the most precious thing in the world to you?" then, well, Waldo, you're hopeless.

The unwanted houseguest

Everybody has one, arrived quite some time ago, most can't even remember when, but herein have they stayed, eating your food, wearing your clothes, speaking your words, thinking your thoughts, feeling your emotions, and experiencing your life, such that you - dear one, completely unaware of this enforced partnership - remain confused, conflicted, and never satisfied.



Rather than, "simply" (as if, eh?) ask/demand the houseguest to leave once and for all time, you tolerate his existence in your house, consuming your energy reserves, and the final "insult," calling himself YOU, such that now, you're not sure who's Who, and what's What!



"Who me!?!" you say, doubting even the possibility, let alone the actuality.



Yes, you, or... haven't you suspected this all along?

E.T.: The Extra-Territorial

Everybody (almost, except those who aren't - ain't it always the way?) is an extra-territorial. Always so damned concerned about the lives - expressed in actions and words - of other people, outside the territorial limits of their rightful jurisdiction, that it literally consumes their every waking moment (in the ordinary sense.)



And, when they don't have other people to be concerned about (including those on tv, radio, movies, in books they've read and are reading, and of course, email lists) - which occurrence is beyond rare indeed - they are concerned about themselves, who (because they are essentially, an extra-territorial) are in fact, also as much outside their legitimate (in the extra-ordinary sense) area-of-concern, as everybody else.



Thus, does E.T., the extra-territorial, justify and rationalize his meager existence here on ol' terra-firma, giving advice and consent (or criticism and complaint) to every living creature, whether it is asked for or not.



Why, because E.T. has no clue what the most precious thing in the world really is, and even when asked, still can't address the question, full-frontally and without fear.

Name change

I was thinking about "gurus" for a couple seconds a while back, and it suddenly occurred to me, that, as a group, they are long overdue for an official name change.



Why? Glad you asked. (as if...) There is too much negative association surrounding the term, that's why. Many people, sophisticated, educated, reasonably aware people hear the term and have an almost immediate negative guttural reaction - you know, "uuhhggh." So much has been written about the shenanigans of so many of these fakes, phonies, and freaks, that even if someone was properly interested in the idea of enlightenment, the thought of having to find a "guru" turns many, if not most of them off, forever.



Therefore, they need an immediate, and universal name change.



I propose the following - you are welcome to your own: "Personal Enlightenment Theorists," or, you gueesed it: Pets.



Yup, that's the ticket. Pets. And we all know the proper relationship one should have with their pets. Personal enlightenment theorists are no different.

Endless chatter...

...is good for the world-soul!



Yes, believe it or not, endless, mindless, frittering away of unnecessary neurons (not to mention the time it takes to do so), occupying hundreds or thousands per chat, burning off all those useless neuropeptides (peptides released by neurons as intercellular messengers) not otherwise needed for more creative thoughts, and building up due to the constant barrage of local- and world-events you can't help but be an individual garbage-pail for, is good for the world-soul!



It cleans out the tubes, unclogs the synapses, like an enema for the brain. Even though it almost always leaves you feeling (if you can feel it) rather spent, having accomplished absolutely nothing at all (if you can realize it), there is another feeling which builds up instead, you could call 'community', or 'sharing', or 'reaching out', or 'participation', or 'doing-your-part' for the world-chatter, which of course is the bedrock of the world-soul.



Let's hear it for >>endless chatter!!<<